And oh… that question.

You know the one. It lands with a sting that’s hard to describe—especially when your heart is full of hope, your calendar is (mostly) full, and you don’t feel lonely… at least not all the time.

But there’s a difference between being alone and feeling lonely.

There’s a certain sting that comes from people assuming your life is incomplete just because you haven’t partnered up yet. Especially when you’ve worked hard to build a good life, one filled with purpose, people, growth—and yes, sometimes longing.

So how do you respond when someone asks, “Are you lonely?”

If you’re like many of my midlife male clients, you might brush it off, crack a joke, or pivot the conversation. But deep down? You might feel a pang of grief, or even shame, as if you’re supposed to have figured it all out by now.

Let me say this LOUD and clear…

You are not broken.

You are not behind.

You are not less of a man because you haven’t yet found your person.

I know this because I coach extraordinary men who are thoughtful, accomplished, funny, generous—and still single. I’ve walked beside them through heartbreak, new hope, and everything in between.

And I’ve been single too.

In fact, as I write this, I’m surrounded by contractors who are currently renovating my home—and I have to say, I really like men. I mean it! These kind, capable, clever guys with their tools and solutions … they bring a burst of masculine energy into my space that I deeply appreciate.

There’s something special about watching a man problem-solve on the fly, figure out the impossible, or lift something heavy without a second thought. That testosterone energy? It makes me feel more me. More feminine. More delighted. It reminds me how beautiful the masculine truly is.

And although I’m engaged now. I found my partner later in life. But during the long season of dating—especially in the thick of COVID—there were times when the loneliness was suffocating. The isolation was oppressive.

As an introvert, I managed… sort of.

Deep conversations and small, intimate connections kept me going. But I often wondered how the extroverts were surviving. No hugs, no casual coffee shop chats, no eye contact in a grocery store line. It must’ve felt like solitary confinement for some.

And here’s the truth: even now, in an exclusive relationship, I still need my solitude. Ask me to go to a networking event? I’m the quiet one in the corner, planning my escape. It takes me days to recover from large groups. But invite me to talk deeply, one-on-one, and I’ll light up like a firefly.

So, to my single brothers out there—especially those navigating midlife with courage, grace, and a quiet hope—I SEE YOU.

If someone asks you if you’re lonely, you get to answer in a way that honors your truth. Maybe you are feeling that ache sometimes. Maybe you aren’t. Maybe you’re content. Or maybe you’re in the middle of becoming.

Let’s take that next brave step together and book a Free 45-minute Dating Strategy Call with me. We’ll talk. No pressure. Just a real conversation about what’s possible

👉 BOOK YOUR FREE CALL HERE

You’re not meant to do this alone.

With love and tenderness,

Coach Krysia 💛

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